I am not really good with "significant events." I am always running late with birthdays, and holidays stress me out. This would be o.k. if I just didn't really care about birthdays and holidays, but I do! I think I care about them a little too much. I want to find the perfect birthday gift! I want to make the holidays super meaningful and fun! And then just thinking about it all stresses me out, and nothing ever happens. I give mediocre gifts, and our holiday celebrations slip by without much fanfare. Which is how we ended up not celebrating Finn's first Halloween.
In my defense, most activities were past his bedtime. The church's "Trunk or Treat?" At six pm. Other Trick or Treating? Around 7 pm. Trick or Treating at the library? 6:30 pm. And while I guess I could make an exception to bedtime (which happens to be at 6), Finn didn't seem all that keen on staying up late. (That's code for nuclear meltdown if he doesn't go to bed Right Away!) The one activity that we could have gone to, I forgot about until it was almost done.
I was more or less o.k. with all of this until I started seeing other moms posting pictures of their precious babies on Halloween, and then I had to get all critical and judge myself against a perfect and (if I am really honest) unrealistic standard. "I didn't celebrate my baby's First Halloween! I fail as a mother!" The mom-guilt is a strong force to reckon with, people. It is silly to feel this way. After all, they guy doesn't even eat solids. He has no idea that Halloween is the time to stock up on free, sugary treats. He doesn't even like strangers. There was no compelling reason to celebrate Halloween, but that doesn't stop me from berating myself.
I did succeed, however, in dressing Finn up as a fuzzy chicken for a playgroup the week of Halloween AND grabbing a picture of it. Ten/twenty years from now, when the details are extremely fuzzy, I will state with extreme assurance to my son, "Of course we celebrated your first Halloween. We even have a picture of you dressed up as a chicken. See? Proof!"